Tuesday, June 18, 2013


It is hard to believe that six years ago today this amazing little boy entered our lives and made us parents! 

I remember going in at night when Brennan was in the NICU for his weight checks. We were so proud of every ounce he gained! We were always so intrigued by his tiny little self and all of his amazing accomplishments. 

We are still amazed each day at the things Brennan knows, how he makes us laugh, how much we see him growing into his own little self. 

I have so much love for this boy! He makes my heart swell a million times its size many times a day.

Brennan is SO much fun to be around! He has this enormous personality and I am always anxious to see what is going to come out of his mouth next:)

I love his sweet side. He is always thinking of Casey and I-what he can share with us, making sure we know how much he loves us.

I love his questions and constant confirmation of everything going on in the world. He wants to know everything about everything. He has this intense curiosity that I admire so much.

He Is really turning into this little jokester.  He is so funny and is always making us laugh:)

I adore his imagination! I love listening to his long, elaborate stories about everything! Just last night he was snuggling with bear and he said they were camping out and having s'mores in his bedroom:)

I can't imagine life without Brennan and I hope I never have to. I am not sad about another birthday, I am happy. Another birthday means he is here, living and breathing, and that makes me so happy

Monday, June 17, 2013

Birthday Eve!

This guy is going to be 6 tomorrow!

Friday, June 14, 2013


I read through my last post and I made so many errors and the last part was confusing! I left with Brennan, but he ultimately wanted to stay however his lesson at that point was that he didn't get to stay because of the way he acted. In case it was as confusing for you:) So he originally said he wanted to go back the next day because it was fun, but later decided he didn't. I wanted him to go back because I know he would have had fun and I wanted him to see that he could stay there without me and it would be fine, but another part of me was glad not to have to deal with any drama:) We ended up going to the movies and had a fun day together. He really is so sweet and such a fun boy to be around-when he doesn't have to leave me;)

I don't think I am homeschooling Brennan this year because Casey is pretty insistent that he go to public school so I have been talking to Brennan a lot about the fact that he will be at school all day-without me. We actually went to the school today to pick up some forms for the doctor, eye doctor, etc. I walked him through the halls and peeked in a few classrooms. He really liked it! I must admit, I was a little anxious. I might be causing the drama when the time comes for him to start school (not in front of him of course!) He is excited that the school mascot is a Hornet:)

I had my follow up yesterday with the surgeon. Everything is going well. I have a slight limp, but unfortunately have still not been able to start physical therapy outpatient. Casey started his new job with new insurance and they have a preexisting condition clause so they won't cover anything related to my surgery-really sucks. I was supposed to have an xray yesterday, but my doctor said it wasn't necessary to put me in debt for it since I am not having any problems. He is seriously one of the best doctors I have met. He is smart, a great surgeon, takes a lot of time to talk about everything. I did find a place that will do my physical therapy for $50/visit. I probably won't go a whole lot, but if I can get some new, more challenging exercises to do at home I think it would help a lot. I did get some tips so I am going to test them out. I am driving which is so wonderful. I feel so free and like I have so much more control! Here is an x-ray the day of surgery-you can see the stem going into my bone, the ball and the plate screwed in.

So our new little kittis kattis made Ellen's facebook page! I forgot that I sent the picture in via her website to 'cute pictures' or something and then a fb friend said that she saw the picture on Ellens' page!  He had over 50,000 likes and 2700 shares! Here is her page if you scroll down a bit you can see him, but here is the famous foto:)

Here he is playing with Mr Hopperson. It was Brennan's bunny now it's the kitty's. I wish I would have gotten a picture of him with it when we first brought him home to compare his size, but I am finally starting to tell that he is bigger. We love him SOOOO much! He is funny and playful and snuggly-just perfect! He eats like a hog and he is not happy when he cannot find his mama! Boots does not like him at all (lots of hisses and swats) and he really just wants to play with her tail-not a good combination. He is going to have to be much bigger before he can be left with her-if at all. We may have another indoor cat whether we like it or not.

Brennan snorkeled at my mom's today:)

Practicing hand stands!

Wednesday, June 12, 2013


There is a reason they say parenting is the hardest job...because it is. It can be hectic dealing with the daily madness of keeping on top of discipline, making sure they eat healthy, get their bath, get to events on time, making sure they mind their manners, but when you are faced with a bigger problem that you really need to get a handle on, that is the hardest part of parenting. Brennan has really been challenging me the last few days. I feel like I do a pretty good job of disciplining, but Brennan obviously has this hold on me where he acts different with me in some instances that with Casey. We struggle at bedtime mostly, but it has carried into other activities as well. This week was swim. I was so excited he could do swim team. He is a good swimmer (not exceptional, but he does well) and he loves to swim so I thought it was the perfect fit. He did really well the first couple of practices. We missed one week when we were in Az although I think they had cancelled at least one anyway. Monday he went and it was cool outside out and the water was cold so I kind of understood when he didn't want to get in. Finally, I convinced him to get in and he had a great time. Then yesterday we went to practice and he went right over and got in the water and did well, but he didn't want to do backstroke so he said he wanted to go home when it came to that point. They did a one on one with him and he did the backstroke really well, but he still didn't want to do it with the other kids. He didn't want to dive either. He is young so I understand there being things he doesn't want to do. Where do I draw the line of making him do it because you have to participate in everything even if there are some things you don't like as much as others. Again, he is young so do I force him to do things he doesn't want-probably not, but I don't want him to think he doesn't have to do some things just because he doesn't want to. It may not seem like a huge deal, but I doubt I am the only parent who questions how even the smallest things will affect how you shape your child. So we got through the rest of practice okay yesterday. Then the first swim meet was last night. Before we leave home he says he doesn't want to do swim anymore. Grrr, how many times have I heard that in the last 2 days! I decided I wanted him to try one meet and after that we would decide. It was at a different pool, there are over 100 kids on our team plus the team we played against, parents, etc. He didn't want to leave me to listen to the coach which was a matter of walking about 15 feet to another part of the pool area-not a big deal.  I did walk him over to where he needed to be to get started for his event in the meet. I was the only parent, but I didn't expect him to know where to go-I didn't even completely know what was going on since it was our first time. I'm sure a lot of the kids have older siblings so they have been there before. So we get over there and he says he doesn't want to swim in the meet. So we left. Swim over. The last 2 days were so stressful trying to get him to participate-not worth it.

So then there is today. My BFF Kate told me about Vacation Bible School in town this week that Brody was doing. Since he was doing swim he couldn't do it the last 2 days, but last night I thought I would talk to him about it since he was done with swim. This morning we talked about it, I told him how long it would be, Brody would be there, I wouldn't be staying etc. He was fine with it all and said he wanted to go. So we get there and he wants me to walk him in, so I do. As soon as we get in he says he wants to go home. I convinced him to sit down by Brody, but he wanted me to stay right there. I told him I would stay a few minutes. Do you see where this is going? It isn't school and he doesn't know the teachers so I don't want to just walk and leave him there when he is saying he wants to go home (which I had to do for preschool at first). Finally, I told him I was leaving and he got upset. I took him the hallway and showed him around and showed him some of the things they would be doing, I took him to the story room where the kids in his group were coming to next. We looked at the beanie animals and looked at their names (we love looking at the names) We waited in there and the kids came in for story time so I told him I was going to leave. He still wanted me to stay, I keep giving in. So he sat on the floor by Brody and I stood by the door. He kept looking back at me. I then stood so he couldn't see me and he ran out crying. Then the teacher encourages me to pull up a chair which I really did not want to do, but did because I felt terrible for interrupting. (All while I am wearing my Nike shirt that says "Never Give In". I can imagine what these teachers and little high school volunteers are thinking) I thought maybe if Brennan saw this part was fun (and it was!) that he would be okay with me leaving after. Brennan sat by me the whole time, but he participated and laughed and had fun. I had told him I was leaving in 15 minutes, 10 minutes, 5 minutes. When they went out to music I encouraged him to get in line and go along with the other kids. He kept by me telling me he didn't want me to leave. So I told him, if I leave and he comes with me that we aren't swimming (which we were supposed to do), he wasn't playing on the computer, no watching tv and he was taking a nap. I started walking out and he is crying because he doesn't want to leave, but he doesn't want me to leave. So I offered to walk him one last time to the music class and he give me a kiss and hug and that's it. So I walked him up and once again he says he doesn't want to go in there. So I walk out, with him following. By the time we got to the car he is crying and screaming because he doesn't want to leave. This is my opportunity-as much as it breaks my heart, to put him in the care kicking and screaming because he wants to stay. He had so many chances and he is old enough that he should not be acting like this. A part of me feels like somewhere it must be my fault, that I have given in way too much. If it had been school and he knew the teachers I would have left from the beginning, but do I leave him crying somewhere he doesn't have to be? For me, I know the answer is no. So anyway, he is hysterical like I have only seen him once before. My heart was aching because who wants to see their child like this, but another part of that same heart knows the right thing to do is leave and teach him a lesson, because now he is understanding what he has done. And that is the really tough part of parenting.

Sunday, June 9, 2013


Started this a couple of days ago and I am just now getting back to it-gah!

We got home from Arizona on Wednesday, what a wonderful trip it was! Much needed for sure. I came home walking-yay! I used the cane a little at the airport because it was a lot of walking (even though I did get a wheelchair coming home), but since then I have really done well without anything.  I still have a long way to go to get back to normal activities, but I am hoping to start outpatient PT this week. I was supposed to start last week, but Casey switched jobs last week and there was a little lapse in getting insurance info straightened out so I am hoping we are squared away next week. I have still been doing my home exercises though. I really want to get there to get some good exercises to get me ready for driving. They said at least 6 weeks and Friday was 6 weeks-I am ready! Brennan has swim practice in the mornings and meets in the evenings and t-ball in the other evenings and we have been missing or relying on others for rides and I am done! My hip precautions are actually getting much easier. I am so used to them now. I see the doctor again Thursday for my follow up and I have lots of questions! I saw him for the steroid shot (which was just what I needed-no knee pain!) but since it was a quick appointment where they squeezed me in, I didn't want to bombard him with Q's.

The rest of our trip was filled with lots of swimming!

Riding in the Ranger!

Love and snuggles!

Lazing around:)

Being silly!

Jack was obsessed with my cane-here he is riding it like a horsey:)

A fund day at an indoor amusement park!

My aunt and uncle have a beautiful view of a mountain behind their house.  It doesn't look that tall in this picture, but it was.

The sun was setting and it was beautiful!

So much fun visiting!!

The night before we left I wanted to get a few pictures of Brennan with a cactus. Their house is literally in the middle of desert like surroundings.

We learned about different kinds of cactus

Some are round...

Some grow flowers

Self portrait with the cactus:)

We were eager to get home to our little love:)

He was being silly one day and running from me and hopped into this hole!