Halloween (and other associated festivities)!

My Mr. Incredible!

Brennan had his Halloween Party for school this morning...the kids had a lot of fun!

They had a "parade" in the classroom to show off their costumes:)

They played games, made artwork and decorated cupcakes, too!

Love the cupcake with 3 eyes, all different sizes:)

Brennan got these cute little monster fingers:)

and silly glasses:P

Oh yeah and the parents were wrapped up like a mummy :) Brennan did not want to wrap me up at first, but I talked him into it. I think he knew it wasn't going to hurt me, but something about not being able to see me, I guess. It wasn't too surprising because of his personality. I posted another example below, but he is so sensitive. It's hard to explain, but I love it about him. Anyway,I tried to help him and put it around my face and he did not like that at all (that's why I look like I have a hat and scarf!), he couldn't wait to get the tissue off of me!

Last week (or the week before?) was Brennan's pumpkin party at school with pumpkin picking. It was pretty chilly so we bundled up, but it was a lot of fun. His school parties are always very busy, his teachers put a lot of time, energy and creativity into his school and the parties do not fall short.

The pumpkin party consisted of picking pumpkins, carving one, making homemade pumpkin pies in the classroom (baking the pumpkin, scooping it out and mixing everything together and baking-yes quite amazing!)

Here is Brennan scooping the guts out of his Jack-O-Lantern at school at his Pumpkin Party. So speaking of Brennan's sensitive side, last year when we carved pumpkins, Brennan's pumpkin ended up with no mouth because Brennan was almost in tears when we talked about "carving the mouth". He is just very sensitive to people and animals and stuffed animals and pumpkins...and everything:)

Luckily, this guy got to have a mouth this year.

They made these adorable shirts last week to wear today before their party started. They are tie dye and the spider is their hand prints and they painted the pumpkins. Adorable!

Here are some Halloween projects he has been working on at school. Ghost and spider...spooky!

Skeleton and bat...I also posted a picture of the bats in the classroom because they were so cute all hanging up together.

We had our own Halloween festivities at home.

We decorated pumpkins for Reese and Scotlyn this weekend.

Brennan is resting up for trick or treating as I am posting this, so stay tuned for pictures with his friends tonight:)

Lions and Tigers and Bears!

We took a spur of the moment, very fun filled trip to the zoo today:)

We (or I) had planned to stay home today since it seems like we're always running around somewhere. I had been wanting to go to the zoo one more time before it got really cold, but I didn't think it was going to happen. This morning the sun was too bright to resist so I packed layers just in case and we headed out. It was perfect! We weren't on any time restraints, Brennan was in such a good mood-it was a really nice trip.

They had their spooky Halloween decor out;)

They had a little station set up near the bears with real bear fur and this bear paw with nails you could try on-Raarrrr!:)

We saw some of our usual stuff and some new stuff that we don't usually see. We usually don't get to the big cats or the bird house or the herpitarium, but we visited new territory and Brennan was so excited! He said his favorite part of the zoo is the snakes and this is the first time we've seen them. Although since he has a great love for animals, usually he has a new favorite every time we go;)

Today was also sort of a new experience for us because we actually took the time to read about the animals. Usually we sort of rush through everything and I'm not sure Brennan would have been as interested as he is now anyway. Brennan loves books and he really enjoyed me reading to him about the different animals. We have been reading about endangered and extinct animals at home so it was nice to point out to him the animals in real life that are endangered.

Roooarrr!!

We also saw the butterflies (my favorite!) These 2 beautiful butterflies were flittering around us together. They reminded me of Reese and Scotlyn♥

Brennan is the most fun little boy to spend my days with and I am so lucky to have him and to have the time to spend days like this with him:)

Life Sentence

The heartbreak of infant loss

By Laura Schubert

Did you know that October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month? I'll bet not. Despite the infant mortality crisis that's been at the forefront of Milwaukee's public health news for months, the only people who have more than a cursory comprehension of what it means to lose a baby are those who've lived it.

Infant loss is nature's cruelest practical joke. It's investing all of the required time and effort into pregnancy, only to be robbed of the result. It's cradling a body that grew within your own and trying to reconcile the cold, lifeless form in your arms with your memory of the baby who turned double flips in your womb.

It's worrying that you'll forget what your child looked like and snapping an album's worth of photos that no one will ever ask to see. It's sobbing so hard you can't breathe and wondering if it's possible to cry yourself to death.

Infant loss is handing off a Moses basket to the nurse who's drawn the unfortunate duty of delivering your pride and joy to the morgue and walking out of a hospital with empty arms.

It's boxing up brand new baby clothes and buying a 24-inch casket. It's sifting through sympathy cards, willing your foolish body to stop lactating, clutching your baby's blanket to your chest in hopes of soothing the piercing ache in your heart.

It's resisting the urge to smack the clueless individuals who compare your situation to the death of their dog or who tell you you'll have another baby, as if children are somehow replaceable.

Infant loss is explaining to your 7-year-old that sometimes babies die and being stumped into silence when she asks you why. It's watching other families live out your happy ending and fighting a fresh round of grief with every milestone you miss.

It's being shut out of play groups for perpetuity. It's skipping social events with expectant and newly minted mothers because, as a walking worst-case scenario, you don't want to put a damper on the party.

It's listening to other women gripe about motherhood and realizing that you no longer relate to their petty parental complaints because, frankly, when you've buried a baby, a sleepless night with a vomiting toddler sounds something like a gift.

Infant loss is pruning from your life the friends and relatives who ignore or minimize your loss. It's recognizing that, while they may not mean to be hurtful, the fact that they don't know any better doesn't make their utter lack of empathy one whit easier to bear.

My baby girl would have been 5 years old this month. I don't know what she'd look like, what her favorite food would be. I've never had the privilege of tucking her into bed, taking her to the zoo or kissing her boo-boos. I will never watch her graduate or walk down the aisle.

Infant loss is more than an empty cradle. It's a life sentence.

Unfortunately, this is all so true. I have explained it as having this nervousness and uneasiness similar to facing an undesirable situation except normally the situation comes and goes and that feeling goes as well. With the loss of a child, it comes, but it never goes. It is there for life.

Eckert's

We went to Eckert's fun farm yesterday since it was so beautiful outside.

The giant slide that started at the top of the hill and went underground. Casey and I both went down with Brennan-we were the biggest kids and did pretty much everything!

We went through a corn maze...and didn't have to call 911;)

This was "Spin the Apple"

The calm before the storm...

Then daddy spun us out of control!

We did this one twice because it was so much fun:)

Brennan said before we even left home that he wanted to ride a pony. Well, when we got there he had a choice between a camel or a pony and he picked the camel.

I was glad he did because he has never ridden one before.

Who says parents can't have a little fun, too?!:)

Actually, I think this is the only ride that Casey or I didn't ride with Brennan on:)

We stumbled upon the pig races so we stayed to watch.

Brennan insisted on going down to the lake, it was a pretty view.

Poem

Poem, Author Unknown

"Do not judge the bereaved mother. She comes in many forms.

She is breathing, but she is dying.

She may look young, but inside she has become ancient.

She smiles, but her heart sobs.

She walks, she talks, she cooks, she cleans, she works, she IS,but she IS NOT, all at once.

She is here, but part of her is elsewhere for eternity."

I found this quote at Dear Stevie, she is also the founder of

It's sort of a relief to find a quote that speaks so clearly as to what you're experiencing. It's the feeling that someone out there truly understands. I know there are entirely too many people who do understand and each of their words are all too familiar yet comforting at the same time.

National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

Today, October 15th, is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. This loss happens far too often and it is heart wrenching to think of how many women are going through the same horrible experience I am. It is a heartache that never goes away. Never. It is a heavy burden to carry each day.





I think about my babies all the time, but today is a day to raise awareness for all of the babies who lost their lives entirely too early and the parents who mourn the loss of their baby at any age. So people know this loss is mourned with heavy hearts and broken dreams, forever. It is a sadness that never completely goes away. I know how important the support that I have received over the last year has been for my healing. This day is to let people know that even though it is sad and sometimes uncomfortable to talk about, these babies need to be remembered because their lives are just as important as our children here on earth. And for the parents who love them more than anything and walk in the shoes of extreme emptiness and heartache for the rest of their lives.




I miss these beautiful girls more than words can ever express. ♥Reese and Scotlyn♥

Soccer!

Brennan is enjoying soccer, as you can see:) I haven't gotten a whole lot of pictures because I'm not really supposed to be there. If you remember my first soccer post when Brennan cried because he wanted to be with me. Well, this is really ridiculous (but it works) I can go, but I have to stay under cover:) I pretty much stand with Casey because Brennan doesn't pay attention to the crowd, but when he comes to get a drink I take cover until he is back on the field. We just didn't want to risk another unproductive practice so thought this was the best way;)

They always do drills for the first part and he really enjoys those, I think it's his favorite part. The coach has them do all sorts of things, here they were running when the coach held up the green flag and stopping on the red flag and Brennan just thinks it's the most fun thing!

At the end they play little scrimmage games, no scores. It's pretty comical to watch them play. Especially when you tell 4 year olds they can't touch the ball with their hands:)

Brennan really just runs up and down the field with the other kids and if the ball happens to come his way then he'll kick it around a bit. Otherwise he is happy just running around:)